You're probably wondering why I'm posting a picture of a mirror and why this post is called "Gazing in the Mirror". Well look no further and I need all readers to find a mirror in their house. Once you do, look at yourself now and then remember how you were a year ago. How much growth did you have since then? Before you think of anything negtive, try to think about what has motivated you to continue standing and how far you've come from what you knew then versus now. Always remember though if you do revert to the negative, think about what your doing to fight it or what brought you through.
Nobodies' journey is going to as easy as a walk in the park regardless of who you are. What one can see on the surface is much different than what's true on the inside. For example, I have so many people I know who think I always have it together and I'm such a talented person. In reality, I wouldnt consider that true at all in my heart. I've constantly gone through constant doubt and struggle for every few steps I've taken forward. Every negative comment that people have said to me, I still remember very vividly word for word.
You know stick and stone may break our bones but let's be honest, words DO hurt us. If they didn't, why would we be saying that they don't in the phrase? It hurts us mentally which is far worse than any physical injury. I would rather someone through a stone than say something mean to me. You won't remember necessarily getting hurt but you will remember when people attack your insecurities or say something rude. Honestly, for every decision I make, I doubt whether it's the right or the wrong one. I really don't have any direction sometimes for where I want to go or who I want to be.
I hate putting forward all my energy to only be told I'm not good enough and then see someone not even put effort in recieve praise for something they did at the last minute and didn't even try on. Sometimes I'm even told "they need the win more than you" and I feel just terrible. So I need to be brought down in order for someone else to be brought up? They get to take what I earned so they can feel like they deserve it. Everyone has potential but if they don't put in the hard work that I did, they don't deserve it. For example, it bothers me how people skip college classes when they are PAYING for it. If college wasn't for you, why do you stay to waste money.
Even in all the trouble, I remember my shining star. The positives always out rule the bad because I'm still living and can try again. I think of the fact I can get back up even if it's not physically, I shouldn't stop trying because those around me didn't give up on me. There are people who helped me raise so it's only right I keep going for the top. Sometimes it may not be my destiny to be the best but I may lead someone to the point where they are the best. I may be who creates the next Beyonce in music or Obama in politics.
Always reflect on the fact we may not be uplifted right now because we are already lifting up others. Just because you don't feel the best yourself, your dedication may be a driving factor for someone to do more in their life. At the same time though, do not destroy every dream to help everyone else with their own dreams. It should all be in balance like Yin Yang. Now, I would like everyone to look in the mirror and tell me what they see. What I see is below.
As I look in the mirror, I look at all that I have accomplished:
-Joining the Sigma Tau Delta Honor Society as a Freshman
-Being the first male in the Blue Mist Flag line of the Orange Crush Marching Band
-Being on the Class Board of 2023 as the Parliamentarian
-Being on the McRary Hall Council as Vice President
-Becoming a model in the first and in my opinion best modeling organization on the Lincoln University campus: Ziana Fashion Club.
-Obtaining Tour Leader position of Admissions Student Ambassador Positions(ASAP).
-A second tenor in the Lincoln University Concert Choir
-A member of the Caribbean Student Association
-A member of the Project Management Team on Suited for Sucess
This isn't where my journey stagnates though because I will continue to grow. You don't stop learning till you die so I have a lot to look forward too. I'm glad to have accomplished joining these groups on Lincoln's campus during my Freshman year. None of these were easy becuase I had to either apply or tryout. For Ziana for example, I didnt make the first tryout but I made it the second time around. I will continue to strive to move forward to not only improve myself but also to help others. Never let anyone determine your worth or purpose in life, only you decide that. Lastly always remember that it isn't the current step that's most important but the next step that is.
